Today was my first exam of the summer, and I can throw away all my history notes from the last year! I'd be more excited about that if I didn't have Biology coming up, even though it's in 10 days it definitely won't be enough time to re-learn the whole syllabus. It's made even worse by the fact that it's synoptic and I remember nothing from last year. It's going so badly that in the last mock we did in class I did even worse than the kid that was dehydrated and fainted. There is no hope...
I'm debating calling my first choice and letting them know that I'm still getting U grades, bit embarrassing but definitely less embarassing than not getting my place in September. I know I need to get a minimum of a C to get the grade I need overall, but that's still four grades higher than I've been getting recently, oops. I don't really have any excuse for not getting the grades I need, think I've just run out of steam.
An even better excuse is that it's my birthday tomorrow, pretty distracting, I'm just pleased that history was today instead of thursday because I'd definitely fail if it was the day after my 18th! It'll be a good way of breaking up the revision, I really suffer from cabin fever and this will definitely help! That being said it's only another week until the sumer, can't wait! Good luck to everyone that has exams coming up, it'll be all over soon enough.
Tuesday, 12 June 2012
Wednesday, 9 May 2012
Getting Cold Feet Already
Well today is the 9th, and I've just replied to my offers hours before the deadline. This is not because I'm lazy or forgot about it over the bank holiday weekend, I've been waiting for an epiphany to make the final decision about university choices just that little bit easier. It didn't happen.
Filling in multiple choice boxes on a screen doesn't really live up to the enormity of the questions they're really asking; 'where do you want to live for the next three years?' and 'which of these institutions will really help you further your career?'. I don't know the answer to either, how are any of us really expected to know 100% what's best for us, or what we really want?
I'm even less sure of where I want to go now that I've filled in my choices. The firm and insurace choices have the same grade boundaries, which I know is a bit silly but I also know that out of the five they're the only two I actually want to go to; so if I don't get the grades then I'm not going at all. Which is really how it should be. There are other ways of getting into the careers that we want, and I'm starting to wonder if I should've looked into them better before applying.
That sounds pretty negative but I'm excited to go really, it'll be fun, and maybe some of us might learn something if we ever turn up to lectures. I'm just not sure how likely it'll be that I'll get in at all at this rate. I only have two exams this time around and a month is hopefully enough time to get ready for both. I hope it is anyway, there's a lot riding on it.
Filling in multiple choice boxes on a screen doesn't really live up to the enormity of the questions they're really asking; 'where do you want to live for the next three years?' and 'which of these institutions will really help you further your career?'. I don't know the answer to either, how are any of us really expected to know 100% what's best for us, or what we really want?
I'm even less sure of where I want to go now that I've filled in my choices. The firm and insurace choices have the same grade boundaries, which I know is a bit silly but I also know that out of the five they're the only two I actually want to go to; so if I don't get the grades then I'm not going at all. Which is really how it should be. There are other ways of getting into the careers that we want, and I'm starting to wonder if I should've looked into them better before applying.
That sounds pretty negative but I'm excited to go really, it'll be fun, and maybe some of us might learn something if we ever turn up to lectures. I'm just not sure how likely it'll be that I'll get in at all at this rate. I only have two exams this time around and a month is hopefully enough time to get ready for both. I hope it is anyway, there's a lot riding on it.
Sunday, 29 April 2012
(Almost) The Final Week
In a matter of days we all have to have replied to our offers or they'll be declined. I don't know how I feel about this for many a reason, and none of them are good ones. The only concrete thing I've learned so far about deadlines is that I like to wait until the very last moment to get everything done, not good, and that I forget that they exist until that final second when everyone else is discussing how pleased they are that it's all done and finished with.
The real reason why I'm putting this off until the final moment is that I'm really not fussy about where I end up. I've narrowed it down to two choices, and they're both equally lovely, and equally crappy, in equal measure. They're both good, they're courses are equally intersting, and pretty similar actually, and I think I'd be happy in either Norwich or Southampton. I really don't know what would be best for me, and neither does anyone else at this point.
It's gotten to the point where I'm sick of trying to work out which is better, because there's so little to differentiate them, except that Norwich is a prettier town with better accomodation, which in the long run is neither here nor there. I'm so torn between them that I've abandonned all hope making a rational, well reasoned argument as to which I should go to, and will just leave it up to a coin toss.
It's pretty scary to think that this time next year we'll almost be done with our first year, if we ever get in. At this point I'll be amazed if I ever make a choice at all, but it'll probably be a spur of the moment one, and hopefully one I'll be happy with. Once the choices are made we won't really hear from the uni's until results day. Horrific thought; opening the results envelope just as a thought is enough to make me vomit, and I'll be so grateful if it doesn't happen in real life.
The real reason why I'm putting this off until the final moment is that I'm really not fussy about where I end up. I've narrowed it down to two choices, and they're both equally lovely, and equally crappy, in equal measure. They're both good, they're courses are equally intersting, and pretty similar actually, and I think I'd be happy in either Norwich or Southampton. I really don't know what would be best for me, and neither does anyone else at this point.
It's gotten to the point where I'm sick of trying to work out which is better, because there's so little to differentiate them, except that Norwich is a prettier town with better accomodation, which in the long run is neither here nor there. I'm so torn between them that I've abandonned all hope making a rational, well reasoned argument as to which I should go to, and will just leave it up to a coin toss.
It's pretty scary to think that this time next year we'll almost be done with our first year, if we ever get in. At this point I'll be amazed if I ever make a choice at all, but it'll probably be a spur of the moment one, and hopefully one I'll be happy with. Once the choices are made we won't really hear from the uni's until results day. Horrific thought; opening the results envelope just as a thought is enough to make me vomit, and I'll be so grateful if it doesn't happen in real life.
Sunday, 22 April 2012
Revision... Already?!
According to my Head of sixth now that we've had our Easter break "all students should be fully rested and prepared for a lot of hard work". Pfft. Yeah sure. I know everyone's been busy but the break was definitely as exhausting as college. The two coursework deadlines were unfortunately not the most taxing part of the two weeks off; I managed to get a job at Tesco, which is a great distraction and excuse to not have been doing my work. The hours are terrible, but the pay is great, and it's far more rewarding than working (in the short-term).
Some people are far better at looking at the big picture than I am. Getting emails about student finance and the deadline to confirm Uni offers are so off-putting. It'll get done in a rush the day before, just like everything else I do. I've started filling in the details for it, like most people, but really it just feels like hassle!
That being said, I'd rather fill out hundreds and thousands of pages of the paperwork than start revising for the summer exams, which we apparently should be getting on with now? I only have two exams, biology the day before my birthday and then history ten days later, which is the best timetable I've ever had, as it means I can definitely go out on my birthday! Perfect! This is helped by not having any English lessons from now on, I've handed in my course work and I'm all done. Such freedom!
Even though there's a lot to do at the moment, it's all for a good cause, and won't be that bad once I've started it, but finding the motivation to stay in and get it done is just not worth it. In the blink of an eye we'll have the May Ball, leaver's hoodies and exams, and then I'll be wishing I'd just got on and done what needed doing.
Some people are far better at looking at the big picture than I am. Getting emails about student finance and the deadline to confirm Uni offers are so off-putting. It'll get done in a rush the day before, just like everything else I do. I've started filling in the details for it, like most people, but really it just feels like hassle!
That being said, I'd rather fill out hundreds and thousands of pages of the paperwork than start revising for the summer exams, which we apparently should be getting on with now? I only have two exams, biology the day before my birthday and then history ten days later, which is the best timetable I've ever had, as it means I can definitely go out on my birthday! Perfect! This is helped by not having any English lessons from now on, I've handed in my course work and I'm all done. Such freedom!
Even though there's a lot to do at the moment, it's all for a good cause, and won't be that bad once I've started it, but finding the motivation to stay in and get it done is just not worth it. In the blink of an eye we'll have the May Ball, leaver's hoodies and exams, and then I'll be wishing I'd just got on and done what needed doing.
Sunday, 26 February 2012
So much to do, so little time.
There's far too much to do at the moment; to the point where I'm tempted to just ignore the whole lot, or set it alight. The pile of coursework that needs editing so drastically that I may as well re-write the whole thing is looking daunting. Add to this friend's 18th's, and a new job, and open days and it makes sense why I've put it on the back-burner.
That being said, I almost felt motivated the other day. Amazing, a true miracle! On the way back from an offer-holder day I genuinely wanted to get on with the work and get my uni place, this faded on the car journey home though. I don't think I'd be so irritated about it if I were able to just get on and do it, but there's an awful lot of peripheral work that seems to accompany it, and that's hassle. I'll gladly write a few pages about Civil Rights, but the bibliography and the sources and everything else just doesn't seem worth doing.
That being said I've got another offer-holder visit coming up, although it does mean a 7 hour drive to the very end of the country. Hopefully it'll get me into the right frame of mind, and keep me there for long enough to get some productive work done. If not then I'm relying on the shock of results day to motivate me. I know I haven't done well, but maybe I need to learn that lesson the hard way, otherwise I may always be this lazy and useless. Not good. At all.
I'd attempt to do some work today, buuuuuuuut no thanks. The sun is out and it is nursing my self-inflicted pains from last night. Today is not the day for English, nor history, and let's face it no day is ever the right day for Biology. I don't have a healthy work ethic, I admit it, and that is the first step to over-coming my problems, apparently. Let's see how long it takes for me to take the other steps...
That being said, I almost felt motivated the other day. Amazing, a true miracle! On the way back from an offer-holder day I genuinely wanted to get on with the work and get my uni place, this faded on the car journey home though. I don't think I'd be so irritated about it if I were able to just get on and do it, but there's an awful lot of peripheral work that seems to accompany it, and that's hassle. I'll gladly write a few pages about Civil Rights, but the bibliography and the sources and everything else just doesn't seem worth doing.
That being said I've got another offer-holder visit coming up, although it does mean a 7 hour drive to the very end of the country. Hopefully it'll get me into the right frame of mind, and keep me there for long enough to get some productive work done. If not then I'm relying on the shock of results day to motivate me. I know I haven't done well, but maybe I need to learn that lesson the hard way, otherwise I may always be this lazy and useless. Not good. At all.
I'd attempt to do some work today, buuuuuuuut no thanks. The sun is out and it is nursing my self-inflicted pains from last night. Today is not the day for English, nor history, and let's face it no day is ever the right day for Biology. I don't have a healthy work ethic, I admit it, and that is the first step to over-coming my problems, apparently. Let's see how long it takes for me to take the other steps...
Wednesday, 8 February 2012
HALF TERM!
I'll admit that I'm overly excited for half term, possibly more so than I was for Christmas, and for one simple reason: sleep. No, wait, two reasons: sleep and going out. A whole week to doss about and do nothing but laze about and see friends. Perfect plan!
That first paragraph is the hypothetical world I wish existed. It is unfortunately not the whole case. I may be able to carry it off for a few days at least, but I have to do my English and History coursework, and some Biology if the course work doesn't kill me. Oh and look for a job because I'm too skint to live at the moment. Wow... So... Half term sounds great...
The even balance between social life and working has always alluded me. I tend to allow one to slip and then have to work really hard to catch up. I'm not advising this because of the health and safety risk associated with it, but it works for me. I like having a week or two of nothingness; going out and letting the paper pile stack up, and then having some serious pressure to work against. It keeps me motivated, and especially if it's not a topic I'm interested in as I know I have to get it done.
It's a shame that I'll have to say goodbye to this strategy next year. I'm assuming that the step up in social and work levels at uni will make this laissez-faire attitude a no-go area. It's not a change I'm looking forward to... But then again there are so many changes that will be welcomed that I guess it'll still be worthwhile... One of the many changes will be the incredibly long holidays! I need one, now!
That first paragraph is the hypothetical world I wish existed. It is unfortunately not the whole case. I may be able to carry it off for a few days at least, but I have to do my English and History coursework, and some Biology if the course work doesn't kill me. Oh and look for a job because I'm too skint to live at the moment. Wow... So... Half term sounds great...
The even balance between social life and working has always alluded me. I tend to allow one to slip and then have to work really hard to catch up. I'm not advising this because of the health and safety risk associated with it, but it works for me. I like having a week or two of nothingness; going out and letting the paper pile stack up, and then having some serious pressure to work against. It keeps me motivated, and especially if it's not a topic I'm interested in as I know I have to get it done.
It's a shame that I'll have to say goodbye to this strategy next year. I'm assuming that the step up in social and work levels at uni will make this laissez-faire attitude a no-go area. It's not a change I'm looking forward to... But then again there are so many changes that will be welcomed that I guess it'll still be worthwhile... One of the many changes will be the incredibly long holidays! I need one, now!
Monday, 30 January 2012
All Done! Oh no wait....
I woke up today with a little smile of relief on my face. I survived the January exams - probably didn't get through it with straight A's, but hey at least I'm still in one piece! I then logged into track, and I've got two new offers! That's four out of five! Amazing! Just got to hope that I've met the required grades, but for the next month and a bit until results day there's nothing that can be done, so I'll just relax.
Well.. I say there's nothing to be done, but that's just not true... I've got to get my English and History course work done before next term, and then revise for the summer exams. I keep trying to remind myself that actually this isn't a never-ending stress- machine, and eventually it'll be the summer holidays, and that's something to look forward to! It's all been planned and booked, and won't clash with the summer exams, which is arguably a good thing, I'm yet to be convinced.
I'm just pleased that I'm not in the year below right now, they're going to a UCAS fayre at Surrey Uni tomorrow, which we all did this time last year. It was good fun, before we arrived. There was a sudden panic when we entered the hall and saw how many stands there were, from universities all over the country. I ended up bringing home so many prospectuses for absolutely no reason. It took hours and hours reading over each one trying to choose a course that I liked, and that wasn't too close or too far away from home - i.e far enough to not have the parents drop in uninvited, but close enough to make use of the free food and washing machine if needed. I don't know how I ever managed to whittle down the hundreds of choices to just five, but over time it just happened, gut instinct more than anything else. I just decided if I didn't really love it straight away then it wasn't worth three years of my life.
Remembering that grand day out reminded me of how much hard work we've already done to get to uni. In a really short space of time we've achieved a massive amount, and we've got even less time now to finish it all up. It's scary but I'm so pleased it's almost over.
Well.. I say there's nothing to be done, but that's just not true... I've got to get my English and History course work done before next term, and then revise for the summer exams. I keep trying to remind myself that actually this isn't a never-ending stress- machine, and eventually it'll be the summer holidays, and that's something to look forward to! It's all been planned and booked, and won't clash with the summer exams, which is arguably a good thing, I'm yet to be convinced.
I'm just pleased that I'm not in the year below right now, they're going to a UCAS fayre at Surrey Uni tomorrow, which we all did this time last year. It was good fun, before we arrived. There was a sudden panic when we entered the hall and saw how many stands there were, from universities all over the country. I ended up bringing home so many prospectuses for absolutely no reason. It took hours and hours reading over each one trying to choose a course that I liked, and that wasn't too close or too far away from home - i.e far enough to not have the parents drop in uninvited, but close enough to make use of the free food and washing machine if needed. I don't know how I ever managed to whittle down the hundreds of choices to just five, but over time it just happened, gut instinct more than anything else. I just decided if I didn't really love it straight away then it wasn't worth three years of my life.
Remembering that grand day out reminded me of how much hard work we've already done to get to uni. In a really short space of time we've achieved a massive amount, and we've got even less time now to finish it all up. It's scary but I'm so pleased it's almost over.
Friday, 13 January 2012
The Final Week
Oh. Well.... Looks like I'm going to have three re-sits in the summer.... Revision is killing me. Interim reports are making it an even more torturous death. And not going out is making me very, very snappy... Which is why I haven't blogged; too much hate, can't vent online, it's mean exposing you innocents to such unkindness!
Oh yeah AND I don't get study leave! AND I have three exams in three days! Pretty sure there's a world-wide conspiracy that has been devised by the evil geniuses that run Edexcel and AQA. It all seems an unneccessarily complicated way to make me unhappy and stressy.
In all honesty I hate feeling like this. I tend not to complain an awful lot about anything. But this is bad... I don't pretend to play it cool about exams; I panic, I revise until I'm comatosed and I then don't read the questions properly and majorly mess up. This is incredibly irritating when I have to listen to everyone in the common room say "Oh yeah, I did an hour or so, should be fine, doesn't matter" and then come out with 94% in each module. Lovely. I'm so pleased for them. I'd give my soul to be so naturally gifted, alas I am but a mere mortal in a state sixth form, which is all well and good but I'd like a safety net when I walk into the exam hall.
Oh well, in a fortnight I'll know whether or not I've absolutely ballsed up this entire thing. Which is good and bad. I'm starting to consider doing a BBC internship and taking that route ... it's probably just being so tired and bored of college and exams making me say that, really I'm not in the right frame of mind to make such decisions. But there's an alternative that I'd genuinely enjoy, which is reassuring. I think I'd do well and enjoy it anyway, just wonder how much help a degree would be right now in a career that so heavily depends on networking and first impressions...
I should really focus on revision and not distract myself with such hypothetical passing thoughts. But... It's hard to put so much into this when it's yet another stepping stone. There's an awful lot of work for very little gain. I wouldn't mind if I felt there was really something that would contribute to my future coming out of this, but we've got to wait another bizillion years to get our degree. Never mind, and chin up! Good luck with the revision and exams, and expel equally pessimisitc thoughts from your pretty little heads!
Oh yeah AND I don't get study leave! AND I have three exams in three days! Pretty sure there's a world-wide conspiracy that has been devised by the evil geniuses that run Edexcel and AQA. It all seems an unneccessarily complicated way to make me unhappy and stressy.
In all honesty I hate feeling like this. I tend not to complain an awful lot about anything. But this is bad... I don't pretend to play it cool about exams; I panic, I revise until I'm comatosed and I then don't read the questions properly and majorly mess up. This is incredibly irritating when I have to listen to everyone in the common room say "Oh yeah, I did an hour or so, should be fine, doesn't matter" and then come out with 94% in each module. Lovely. I'm so pleased for them. I'd give my soul to be so naturally gifted, alas I am but a mere mortal in a state sixth form, which is all well and good but I'd like a safety net when I walk into the exam hall.
Oh well, in a fortnight I'll know whether or not I've absolutely ballsed up this entire thing. Which is good and bad. I'm starting to consider doing a BBC internship and taking that route ... it's probably just being so tired and bored of college and exams making me say that, really I'm not in the right frame of mind to make such decisions. But there's an alternative that I'd genuinely enjoy, which is reassuring. I think I'd do well and enjoy it anyway, just wonder how much help a degree would be right now in a career that so heavily depends on networking and first impressions...
I should really focus on revision and not distract myself with such hypothetical passing thoughts. But... It's hard to put so much into this when it's yet another stepping stone. There's an awful lot of work for very little gain. I wouldn't mind if I felt there was really something that would contribute to my future coming out of this, but we've got to wait another bizillion years to get our degree. Never mind, and chin up! Good luck with the revision and exams, and expel equally pessimisitc thoughts from your pretty little heads!
Thursday, 22 December 2011
How not to revise.
I'll be perfectly honest and admit that when it comes to revision I'm useless. I'm distracted by eveverything. I'll use any excuse to stop. I'd rather tidy my room than revise; which for me says a lot... I can't help myself! Somehow this is even worse when it's a re-sit, the Irish history module didn't go well for me... I thought it was boring the first time round, doing it again is the most disgusting thing ever!
I'm starting to consider serious measures to keep myself focussed. This includes (be seated before reading, it's shocking) deleteing Facebook. Ouch. I know. I'm usually not that addcted to it, but seeing as I'm online a lot at the moment trying to look for past paper question and other such boring tasks I find it's somehow so much more rewarding to go and complain to everybody else who can't revise too!
I do start the day well, I wake up feeling panicked, and then by the time I get downstaires I've instantly forgotten any feelings of urgency. Really I should be way more stressed than my friends about it, for two big reasons. The first is that they're all smarter than me, by quite a noticable amount, and the second is that all three of my exams are within a three day streatch, one after the other. I know there isn't any point complaining about the timetable, because there isn't anything that I can do about it, but even so I'm pretty sure that examiners are picking on me just for the fun of it... Shame.
Should probably stop blogging and get on with biology, but I really don't think anybody in the whole world will really care how ATP is made. And at what point will photosynthesis really be needed in later life? Ugh. Hate it. At least it's nearly Christmas, something to look forward to, I think... And then New Year's, which is DEFINITELY something to look forward to!
I'm starting to consider serious measures to keep myself focussed. This includes (be seated before reading, it's shocking) deleteing Facebook. Ouch. I know. I'm usually not that addcted to it, but seeing as I'm online a lot at the moment trying to look for past paper question and other such boring tasks I find it's somehow so much more rewarding to go and complain to everybody else who can't revise too!
I do start the day well, I wake up feeling panicked, and then by the time I get downstaires I've instantly forgotten any feelings of urgency. Really I should be way more stressed than my friends about it, for two big reasons. The first is that they're all smarter than me, by quite a noticable amount, and the second is that all three of my exams are within a three day streatch, one after the other. I know there isn't any point complaining about the timetable, because there isn't anything that I can do about it, but even so I'm pretty sure that examiners are picking on me just for the fun of it... Shame.
Should probably stop blogging and get on with biology, but I really don't think anybody in the whole world will really care how ATP is made. And at what point will photosynthesis really be needed in later life? Ugh. Hate it. At least it's nearly Christmas, something to look forward to, I think... And then New Year's, which is DEFINITELY something to look forward to!
Sunday, 4 December 2011
Why my Advent Calander made me cry...
I'll have to take a deep breath before sharing this very distressing story with you all... But may I just say that I'd had a very difficult december 1st, mainly because my biology ISA was a complete disaster, and I then managed to leave my ENTIRE folder in the LRC and convinced myself that it had run away and would never be returned.
Hopefully you'll now know quite how delicate I've been feeling since the application has been sent off. Friends keep posting on facebook about their successses at interviews, and I really really want to be pleased for them... But... Hmm.. I know it's my own silly fault for not having sent mine off earlier on but jealousy makes even the sanest of society completely irrational. So I clearly don't stand a chance.
Anyway, back to the main source of sadness; my advent calander. When my mum handed it to me and said "I'll have to post you one next year. It'll be so upsetting decorating the tree without you." I just felt blue... Yep, cold feet had set in. And I've only just applied! The chocolate covered ticking time bomb from Thorntons just made me realise how little time we had until the end of term, the exams in january, and having to leave our friends and family.
The depressing musing was temporarily broken by the chocolatey goodness and trying to beat my brother at the spot the difference on the back of the box ( I so let him win, confidence boost needed...) I tend to not take life lessons from year 10 students, but as it went my brother was of some use. He asked if he could come up to stay with me for a weekend once I'm at uni. I asked "Why?" without really thinking, and was astonished by the answer... He said "I'll miss you and stuff, but really I think it's massively unfair that you get to go away, make loads of new friends, have a great time in a new place, live on your own, learn loads of cool stuff about the only subject you love, and I have to stay here and do Geography for another two years..."
It might not have been the most eloquent way of putting it; but really it's always easier to be convinced by somebody else that you'll have a great time, rather than trying to make yourself believe it. We haven't ever really talked about 'serious' subjects of life before, but if I had know how wise my little brother was, I would have consulted him on all manner of subjects. Hadn't quite realised how tough it will be to leave home, or quite how easy it'll be to have a great time once I've gone. And now it really feels like I've got something worth working for.
Hopefully you'll now know quite how delicate I've been feeling since the application has been sent off. Friends keep posting on facebook about their successses at interviews, and I really really want to be pleased for them... But... Hmm.. I know it's my own silly fault for not having sent mine off earlier on but jealousy makes even the sanest of society completely irrational. So I clearly don't stand a chance.
Anyway, back to the main source of sadness; my advent calander. When my mum handed it to me and said "I'll have to post you one next year. It'll be so upsetting decorating the tree without you." I just felt blue... Yep, cold feet had set in. And I've only just applied! The chocolate covered ticking time bomb from Thorntons just made me realise how little time we had until the end of term, the exams in january, and having to leave our friends and family.
The depressing musing was temporarily broken by the chocolatey goodness and trying to beat my brother at the spot the difference on the back of the box ( I so let him win, confidence boost needed...) I tend to not take life lessons from year 10 students, but as it went my brother was of some use. He asked if he could come up to stay with me for a weekend once I'm at uni. I asked "Why?" without really thinking, and was astonished by the answer... He said "I'll miss you and stuff, but really I think it's massively unfair that you get to go away, make loads of new friends, have a great time in a new place, live on your own, learn loads of cool stuff about the only subject you love, and I have to stay here and do Geography for another two years..."
It might not have been the most eloquent way of putting it; but really it's always easier to be convinced by somebody else that you'll have a great time, rather than trying to make yourself believe it. We haven't ever really talked about 'serious' subjects of life before, but if I had know how wise my little brother was, I would have consulted him on all manner of subjects. Hadn't quite realised how tough it will be to leave home, or quite how easy it'll be to have a great time once I've gone. And now it really feels like I've got something worth working for.
Monday, 28 November 2011
Starting to stress...
Let me set the scene: me, happily sat writing a little essay about Civil Rights for my history lesson tomorrow, when I was rudely interrupted by a terrifying email from UCAS. They have my application... I don't have a rational explanation for my reaction to this, but I suddenly felt very protective of the little thing, as though they've taken it hostage. I really didn't want to send it, and had put if off for far too long.. But now it's gone. Forever.
It feels as though I'm in an odd limbo; they have the application, and in 24 hours they'll have processed it. I have to wait 24 hours until I can log into the Track. I have to wait for Uni Admin staff to process it. I have to wait for emails from genuinely important people, instead of the usual tosh Facebook sends my way. This passive waiting game really irritates me! I want to do something productive, even if the alternative would mean cycling to each university and handing it over myself, or sending it by carrier pidgeon.
Unfortunately UCAS is not the only source of stress that filled my weekend. The smaller of my two kittens decided not to come home last night. I suddenly realised that I have turned into a lonely Cat-Lady a good 50 years before I'm supposed to. I panicked far too much, and decided the only logical solution was to go out on a search party, which obviously meant knocking on all my neighbours' doors to see if they'd seen him, or stolen him. Yet it was all in vain.
My mum made the rather useless parrallel between this stupid kitten and my own useless ways when I go out and forget that I own a phone. Oops. It's a lesson learned at least. Another lesson learned is that the little kitten is allowed outside, and nine out of ten times he'll return home just fine, and so he did. I came downstairs this morning and he was cuddled up in the dog bed, with the dog, and the other kitten too. It was an odd sight, but a happy one none the less.
Although this kitten tangent is of absolutely no use to anybody, and has nothing to do with UCAS, I thought you might need a little distraction. It's compulsory to evenly balance useful work with mind-numbing rubbish. Disclaimer: Absolutely no qualified teacher will fully endorse that idea, and I'm really sorry if you fail all your January exams because of it...
It feels as though I'm in an odd limbo; they have the application, and in 24 hours they'll have processed it. I have to wait 24 hours until I can log into the Track. I have to wait for Uni Admin staff to process it. I have to wait for emails from genuinely important people, instead of the usual tosh Facebook sends my way. This passive waiting game really irritates me! I want to do something productive, even if the alternative would mean cycling to each university and handing it over myself, or sending it by carrier pidgeon.
Unfortunately UCAS is not the only source of stress that filled my weekend. The smaller of my two kittens decided not to come home last night. I suddenly realised that I have turned into a lonely Cat-Lady a good 50 years before I'm supposed to. I panicked far too much, and decided the only logical solution was to go out on a search party, which obviously meant knocking on all my neighbours' doors to see if they'd seen him, or stolen him. Yet it was all in vain.
My mum made the rather useless parrallel between this stupid kitten and my own useless ways when I go out and forget that I own a phone. Oops. It's a lesson learned at least. Another lesson learned is that the little kitten is allowed outside, and nine out of ten times he'll return home just fine, and so he did. I came downstairs this morning and he was cuddled up in the dog bed, with the dog, and the other kitten too. It was an odd sight, but a happy one none the less.
Although this kitten tangent is of absolutely no use to anybody, and has nothing to do with UCAS, I thought you might need a little distraction. It's compulsory to evenly balance useful work with mind-numbing rubbish. Disclaimer: Absolutely no qualified teacher will fully endorse that idea, and I'm really sorry if you fail all your January exams because of it...
Wednesday, 23 November 2011
Easily distracted? Me?!
So as of about an hour ago my UCAS application has been completed, kinda... I've grammer and spell checked and put in every choice and polished it until it can't shine anymore... But I haven't sent it. Still. For absolutly no good reason.
UCAS asked me how I'd like to pay my £22, and I had a minor epiphany: IT'S ALMOST CHRISTMAS!!!!! On that shocking note, I opened a new tab, and started shopping, for myself mainly ( no, not because I'm selfish, I'm making life easier for everybody by choosing, thankyou!) and so the hour passed by, as did the £20(ish), but on boohoo.com, shame...
Unproductive? I beg to differ! But not quite the task I should've been focussing on right at that very moment, I'll give you that one. It's made only a little bit worse as I've got Parent's Evening tonight, and I know full well that all, yes, ALL my teachers will ask if I've sent off my application. I'll squirm in my seat, mumbling to my feet that it's all ready to go. I'll get the disapproving head-tilt and sympathetic smile as they remind me that it's a difficult decision to make, but has to be done. Does it? Does it really have to be done?
I'm not for a second saying I don't want to go to university. It's just that apathy is dangerous when in such high quantities, on such a regular basis. I'll get it done, sooner or later. Okay, just later. Sooner is not a viable, plausable option, and I'd hate for you to think I'm lying to you.
UCAS asked me how I'd like to pay my £22, and I had a minor epiphany: IT'S ALMOST CHRISTMAS!!!!! On that shocking note, I opened a new tab, and started shopping, for myself mainly ( no, not because I'm selfish, I'm making life easier for everybody by choosing, thankyou!) and so the hour passed by, as did the £20(ish), but on boohoo.com, shame...
Unproductive? I beg to differ! But not quite the task I should've been focussing on right at that very moment, I'll give you that one. It's made only a little bit worse as I've got Parent's Evening tonight, and I know full well that all, yes, ALL my teachers will ask if I've sent off my application. I'll squirm in my seat, mumbling to my feet that it's all ready to go. I'll get the disapproving head-tilt and sympathetic smile as they remind me that it's a difficult decision to make, but has to be done. Does it? Does it really have to be done?
I'm not for a second saying I don't want to go to university. It's just that apathy is dangerous when in such high quantities, on such a regular basis. I'll get it done, sooner or later. Okay, just later. Sooner is not a viable, plausable option, and I'd hate for you to think I'm lying to you.
Sunday, 20 November 2011
A little off topic.. But still almost worth talking about
Sorry, it's been a while. I'll make up for my negligent behaviour by having a little moral chat with you, instead of telling you the many things that have come between me and my blog and my personal statement (although that might make a more interesting read).
So far, the only two posts I've made haven't really centred on UCAS or applying... hopefully nobody really minds and so I'll carry on in the same fashion. In a nutshell, I was watching a little newsclip about us students, and drugs. Unheard of, I know! But this is all new, I promise. So instead of Paxman banging on about the protesters camping out in London, even though they should've gone by now, it was actually about the uber-nerds who are getting their fix of something called Modafanil before revising through the night before turning up to their exams.
Let me enlighten those of you also hadn't heard of this before. Broadly speaking, this is steroids for mathematicians. It increases cognitive skills and makes it easier for you to stay up late studying and perform better in exams. It's roughly the same kind of chemicals you'd find in ritalin, but you can only buy it online. So although it's not 'illegal' it's definitely more difficult to get ahold of than Proplus, and certainly unethical. Higher education has already been separated out into different tiers, and is being further split by drug-dealers, sorry, pharmaceutical companies, too? Surely not!
In my mind, and you're welcome to disagree with me, it's the same dilemma that athletes face : there's a massive difference between drinking a protein shake, and taking banned steroids. Loads of people take their vitamin C or cod liver oil etc, but this seems a step way too far to be tolerated. Although it wouldn't be fair to have universities make every above-average student take a drugs test just in case they are taking Modafinil (or anything more recreational) they should definitely be discouraging students from doing so officially.
Think that's that rant over and done with. Maybe next time I'll post something nice and sweet and focussed on applying to university... but only maybe...
( P.S. Still no closer to fine-tuning my statement. Now where do I get that Modafinil ? joke )
So far, the only two posts I've made haven't really centred on UCAS or applying... hopefully nobody really minds and so I'll carry on in the same fashion. In a nutshell, I was watching a little newsclip about us students, and drugs. Unheard of, I know! But this is all new, I promise. So instead of Paxman banging on about the protesters camping out in London, even though they should've gone by now, it was actually about the uber-nerds who are getting their fix of something called Modafanil before revising through the night before turning up to their exams.
Let me enlighten those of you also hadn't heard of this before. Broadly speaking, this is steroids for mathematicians. It increases cognitive skills and makes it easier for you to stay up late studying and perform better in exams. It's roughly the same kind of chemicals you'd find in ritalin, but you can only buy it online. So although it's not 'illegal' it's definitely more difficult to get ahold of than Proplus, and certainly unethical. Higher education has already been separated out into different tiers, and is being further split by drug-dealers, sorry, pharmaceutical companies, too? Surely not!
In my mind, and you're welcome to disagree with me, it's the same dilemma that athletes face : there's a massive difference between drinking a protein shake, and taking banned steroids. Loads of people take their vitamin C or cod liver oil etc, but this seems a step way too far to be tolerated. Although it wouldn't be fair to have universities make every above-average student take a drugs test just in case they are taking Modafinil (or anything more recreational) they should definitely be discouraging students from doing so officially.
Think that's that rant over and done with. Maybe next time I'll post something nice and sweet and focussed on applying to university... but only maybe...
( P.S. Still no closer to fine-tuning my statement. Now where do I get that Modafinil ? joke )
Wednesday, 9 November 2011
My ever-so productive day!
Well today was protest day.... And I didn't go. It seems a shame seeing as it encompasses so many things I, and almost all students and sane-people love. I've listed the top three for you:
1.Walking about London, (without the endless shopping that exhausts both soul and purse)
2.Getting the felt-tips out for a colourful( in language as well, of course) poster
3.Generally complaining away and having a good vent to like-minded souls who share our pain.
I had far too many essays to do, and I've also managed to get most of my personal statement sorted, which is an absolute weight off my mind, and it's now sat awaitin' on the Head of Sixth form's desk. I look forward to seeing exactly how much red ink has been used across the page; always a pleasure to edit!
I haven't exactly adopted the hardcore, rebel-teenage, revolutionary attitude I'd like at times like this, because I genuinely do think that it's a cause worth raising our voices for... Then again if I don't get my work done then I won't get the grades I need to secure a place, or won't end up paying the fees anyway! Not that it detracts from the rise being unethical, obviously, so really even if I wasn't planning to go to university at all I'd still think it was a worthy cause for a stretch of the legs!
To all or any of you that went out today and marched peacefully I thank you. You're representing a worthy cause and have the full backing of any moral peer across the entire country. Let's hope some MP's can get away from Theresa May's mess, and the Greeks, and the Italians, oh just the Eurozone in general, to pay us teeny tots some attention !
1.Walking about London, (without the endless shopping that exhausts both soul and purse)
2.Getting the felt-tips out for a colourful( in language as well, of course) poster
3.Generally complaining away and having a good vent to like-minded souls who share our pain.
I had far too many essays to do, and I've also managed to get most of my personal statement sorted, which is an absolute weight off my mind, and it's now sat awaitin' on the Head of Sixth form's desk. I look forward to seeing exactly how much red ink has been used across the page; always a pleasure to edit!
I haven't exactly adopted the hardcore, rebel-teenage, revolutionary attitude I'd like at times like this, because I genuinely do think that it's a cause worth raising our voices for... Then again if I don't get my work done then I won't get the grades I need to secure a place, or won't end up paying the fees anyway! Not that it detracts from the rise being unethical, obviously, so really even if I wasn't planning to go to university at all I'd still think it was a worthy cause for a stretch of the legs!
To all or any of you that went out today and marched peacefully I thank you. You're representing a worthy cause and have the full backing of any moral peer across the entire country. Let's hope some MP's can get away from Theresa May's mess, and the Greeks, and the Italians, oh just the Eurozone in general, to pay us teeny tots some attention !
Friday, 4 November 2011
The first of many whinges....
It's never great to start on a down note; but it has to be done. I've spent all of half term bed-ridden with the most disgusting cold, and then went on a biology trip to slapton sands. I genuinely don't know which was more painful... The combination of the two means I have done absolutely none of the work I needed to do. So I still haven't put my choices onto my UCAS, I still haven't finalised my personal statement, and I still haven't started working towards my history re-sit.
It isn't looking good...
It's funny because I really did mean to get so much done; I'd even written a timetable! But somehow I now just can't do anything productive at all, and have even less of an incentive to do so because of bonfire night tomorrow. I'm using the rubbish excuse that I'm not the only one who's let everything slide over the week off, but I also know that there are loads of others who are FAR more together than I am!
I think I should be panicking a lot more than I am...
It isn't looking good...
It's funny because I really did mean to get so much done; I'd even written a timetable! But somehow I now just can't do anything productive at all, and have even less of an incentive to do so because of bonfire night tomorrow. I'm using the rubbish excuse that I'm not the only one who's let everything slide over the week off, but I also know that there are loads of others who are FAR more together than I am!
I think I should be panicking a lot more than I am...
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